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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2012 18:38:01 GMT -5
The Owlery was one of those places that was always noisy and bustling with activity. Mind you, in a school it was harder to find a place that wasn't a hub of action at some point in the day, but the Owlery was different. This was because most of the occupants were not students in different house colors, but owls who came and went as they pleased from un-glassed windows, who littered the floor with the remains of thousands of small animals, and who spent most afternoons shuffling sleepily on their perches, puffing up feathers and occasionally fighting each other for a lazy, warm ray of sun, like giant feathered cats.
Even with most of their occupants being inactive during the day, it was not usually the place you came to think. But it was one of those good places to go when you wanted to be alone, without feeling like you were sectioning yourself off from the rest of the school. Remus hadn't gone there specifically for that reason - he legitimately had a letter to send home. But before the sun had fully come up he had sent off a handsome tawny school owl with the letter clasped in his beak, and he still hadn't moved to head down to breakfast. Instead, he listened to the quiet trills and hoots and shrieks of the birds, shifting his feet and hoping that the crackling underfoot wasn't actually what he thought it was.
He didn't know why, either. He wasn't feeling particularly upset. He wasn't avoiding anyone in particular. In fact, all considered he was feeling quite well. But for the past half hour he hadn't even gotten close to crossing the threshold and heading back down the spiraling tower stairs. Even if he told himself she should go down and finish proofreading his Transfigurations essay, or head back to the dorm before either of his roommates decided planning some asinine scheme.
Maybe, just maybe - he was enjoying the fairly quiet morning to himself.
No, that couldn't be it. Even in Gryffindor Common Room things were fairly quiet a few hours before Breakfast. If you sat around looking like you didn't want to be bothered (particularly if you were wearing the added bonus of a prefect badge) the younger years left you alone, and the seventh years did too. Which left only his year, most of who knew well enough that if he looked like he didn't want to talk, you couldn't pry a word out of him. He could have had a perfectly nice, quiet morning with the added benefit of cushy armchairs and a stoked fireplace - instead he was somewhat shivering in a second-hand jumper and just...waiting.
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Post by spoonygelato on Jun 29, 2012 19:25:11 GMT -5
It was cool empty mornings that seemed to best fit her mood. Leonie had a very tiny smile on her face, which was a huge leap from the wide terrified eyes and twisting trembling frown normally plastered on her face. She'd smoothed down her skirt and shirt, and checked her pale face in the mirror. Combing her fingers through her hair she glanced at the dark circles under her eyes, most of her family hadn't gotten much sleep recently for a long time and it wasn't a surprise that the pressure school put on her didn't help her in the least. So she'd woken up early and gotten dressed, refreshing herself with cold water before heading down to the Hufflepuff common rooms. Grasping a piece of parchment she sat at a table and crossed her ankles, dipping a quill delicately into an inkwell before scribbling a long thoughtful note to her mother, anxiety twisting in her stomach thinking of the long walk to the Owlery. Signing her name with love she sealed the envelope with a bit of ribbon and stood, smoothing herself out before wandering out into the cool hallway. Watching herself carefully she slipped through the halls, managing to dodge most early bird students and only running into Professor Sprout once, who smiled at her encouragingly since she knew how hard it was for the girl to survive day to say.
Leonie seemed to relax as she exited the building. Her pale washed out appearance seemed to fade into her surroundings as she wandered across the lawn to the large tower. Her lips trembled slightly as she carefully stepped up and gripped the railing. There would be no one up there right? Non. Impossible. Sighing to herself for her unfounded fears she shook her head and gripped the railing with more determination. She would make it up there and send off her letter. She nearly screamed as something made contact with her leg, but glancing down she only saw the sweet face of her faithful companion. The large fluffy cat swished her tail and gazed at her owner. "Soleil." The girl called fondly as the cat started the long trekk to the tower. Stepping just behind the cat she felt her fears ebbing away, listening to the claws gently clicking on the stone.
The cat walked in first, the owls hooting and scattering away as they gazed upon the supposed threat. Leonie walked in, totally relaxed, until she noticed a figure. Her head exploded with a sudden pain as anxiety crashed in waves upon her body. With a gasp she stumbled back, the letter fluttering from her hand as she nearly tripped down the stairs. Clinging to the railing she stared at the boy with wide eyes, lips trembling. Soleil looked at her distressed mistress and mewed, brushing against the poor scared girls legs. Leonie was at a loss for words, unsure of what to do and frightened by the fact she hadn't known someone was already up here.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2012 21:59:22 GMT -5
He wasn't sure when it came to his attention that he was alone. Remus had heard something on the stairs, and immediately he stopped, letting his hands drop to his side even though he hadn't actually been doing anything guilty. But rather than see a person, there was -
A cat.
Letting out a breath he hadn't know he'd taken in, Remus felt like hitting himself. It was just a stupid cat. One of hundreds of pampered felines that roamed the castle at their leisure. Someone must have left a common room entrance open, and they were out grabbing a snack. Not that it was the smartest idea, waltzing into the owlery where there were half a dozen predatory birds who were giving it an obvious stink-eye. It was almost silly that he'd been so jumpy.
"Hey kitty." He was half afraid that one of the braver birds would swoop down to take a nip out of it. Whoever it's owner was, they wouldn't be happy if that happened. It was hard to bend down, as he didn't want to touch the somewhat filthy floor, but he managed a sort of half-crouch with some general achy protest from the rest of his body. Extending an arm in front of him in what he hoped was a sort of friendly, beckoning gesture. The cat, of course, gave him one look, then snubbed him as any self-respecting feline was want to do.
Or maybe it was because their owner showed up.
Of all the positions to be caught in - this was possibly the least flattering. For a moment, he froze. It was far from comfortable, but for the time being his mind had yet to catch up with the pain in his back and simply focused on staring at the other girl like Grindylow thrown up on the banks of the Black Lake. Say something. Say something mildly intelligent. Move, at least! His mind screamed, but it took still longer for the rest of him to catch up.
"Oh." That was what he managed. That was the groundbreaking apology/greeting the mind of Remus Lupin could come with. At least he suddenly found himself regaining enough motor skills to stand up, though his arms dangled listlessly at his sides as if they had fallen asleep. He wasn't exactly used to being looked at with such...fear? Was she actually afraid of him? It stung, really, because he didn't think he was all that threatening to look at.
Of course, that wasn't entirely true. But as that little tidbit wasn't something widely advertised, that couldn't be it at all. Even if he was feeling quite like a cornered animal at the moment, that couldn't be the case. Couldn't be.
For a Gryffindor, it took a few more seconds ticking by at a sluggish pace before he seemed to muster up that courage renowned in his house. "I'm sorry." He started, thrilled to find he could manage more than monosyllables now. "I, uh...didn't meant to startle you. I was, sending a letter and I..."He trailed off, finding it much easier to look at the floor, where he noticed the rolled up bit of parchment fallen forgotten to the floor. "Is that yours?"
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Post by spoonygelato on Jun 30, 2012 11:09:04 GMT -5
Leonie glanced around nervously. Somehow she found that she couldn't find an easy escape route despite the stairs being right next to her. In full panic mode she managed to trap herself in a situation that was easily escapable without much thought. Staring at him like a frightened child wasn't going to help her situation at all, but she couldn't manage to make anything intelligent to escape her lips. She had a multitude of things to say to him, but her mind blanked out suddenly and she merely gaped at him like a fish out of water. She jumped as he spoke, somehow not having expected to hear his voice. Usually by now people got fed up by the awkward silence and pushed past her, and she hoped for once that it wouldn't happen. She wasn't sure how long she would be there shaking if he brushed by her now.
Her sense of peace shattered she focused her gaze on Soleil, who mewed and took a few steps toward Remus. The cat seemed to sense that this human wouldn't hurt her mistress, so she brushed and purred against the male's legs and looked at her mistress. The human was harmless. Focused on the cat Leonie shyly turned her gaze up toward Remus, gazing at him from under her dark lashes. "B...b....bonjour." She grimaced as her voice drifted out in monotone, she desperately wished to convey to him that she had an issue, that she wasn't weird and freaky like people seemed to think. Fingers trembling she crouched down and with slight desperation reached out to Soleil, who trotted over to affectionately nuzzle Leonie's hand. Licking her dry lips she collected the cat to her bosom and stood on wobbly legs.
She seemed to be struggling to speak, nothing more than single worded answers drifting into her mind. With much difficulty she attempted to keep the emotionless tone from her voice. "U-u-uhm...N..not your....fault." She took a deep breath as her eyes shone wetly. A part of her heart fluttered, she was talking to someone! A part of her brain screamed at her loudly. DON'T SCREW THIS UP! YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY MAKE A FRIEND! SOMEONE WHO COULD UNDERSTAND YOU! With a deep breath her gaze flickered to the piece of parchment that had escaped her grasp. Her stomach lurched as her knees refused to cooperate with her, she couldn't move toward it. "Ah....o.......oui." She cast him a desperate look, she knew she couldn't move without her knees giving out.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 30, 2012 13:18:23 GMT -5
At least, it seemed, he wasn't the only one who had struggled to find something to say. Even when he'd managed to unstick the words from her own throat, she continued to just – stand there. It was, at the very least, a little unnerving – being stuck in a impromptu starring contest he had no intention of winning.
Maybe if he looked anywhere but at her. From looking at the letter on the floor he turned instead and interested himself in a bit of crumbling masonry a few feet to her left. But seconds ticked by, and curiosity got the better of him. Still, nothing – although her cat had warmed up to him a bit. He felt something brush against the leg of his pants, and looked down to see the fluffy animal twining around his legs as if he'd known Remus for longer than a few minutes. It made him smile, but it didn't stay long. He was beginning to worry that he'd done something wrong.
Just beginning to wonder if she was actually the victim of a particularly strong silencing charm, she spoke up. He'd grown so accustomed to the stretching silence that it was hard not to turn to become fixated on her. She sounded strange – but it was not the sort of thing it was polite to point out to people. In fact, he felt happy enough that she finally said something that he would have been glad if she'd spouted in mermish, let alone a stumbling monotone.
But as quickly as he felt like he could relax a bit, to feel like everything was relatively okay – he noticed the added shininess in her eyes and immediately felt panic ratchet up another notch. “Oh, no no – don't worry. I ah, understand. You startled me, I startled you. It was no one's fault, really.”This was new – apologizing for apologizing. But he didn't want her to worry or cry or lapse back into silence, which he was afraid she would. He scrambled to think of something, something he could do to fix things, and once again he looked down to the fallen letter, and her, now with her arms filled with cat.
“Hey, I – I can get it for you if you want. No trouble.” He took a hesitant step forward, then another, keeping his pace slow and ready to step back fast if it seemed to worry her.
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Post by spoonygelato on Jun 30, 2012 21:19:44 GMT -5
Her pink tongue flicked out to lick her lips again, she glanced down at the letter and nodded numbly. "P....pl...please?" Her knees locked tightly and she held her breath seeing him step closer. She did need her letter back, and she stood watching him with a cautious gaze to see if he really would do it for her, or if he had expected her to decline and get it herself. Hands shaking nervously she clutched to the cat in her arms, who was purring comfortingly. She thought about Soleil for a moment, about how the cat in her arms wasn't really meant to be a pet but a companion animal who was trained to help the girl with her anxiety, and in a worst case scenario was trained to go looking for help if it became too much.
It's just one boy. You aren't in a crowd, it's one person who's trying to make conversation with you. As if doubting herself she glanced around, and slowly felt her anxiety ebbing away with the passing breeze. She wasn't so bad when it was a one on one situation, but most people didn't give her enough time to calm down to find out. They were too impatient, and she heard the things they whispered about her behind her back. At this point she was happy that just one person seemed to be sensitive to her distress and was trying to help rather than just running away from her and her problem. Building the courage she knew she'd need, she did something she hadn't done since her first year at the school with her teachers.
Collecting her cat against one arm, she reached out with her other toward the boy in front of her. Her fingers were trembling, along with her lips, but she was quietly determined to cross this bridge. "L-Leonie." This time her voice came out, a bit scared but overall sweet with a light singing accent. Inwardly a deep sigh ran through her, comforted by the loss of the monotone she had obtained during their first awkward bouts of attempted conversation.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 1, 2012 19:35:13 GMT -5
As he hesitantly approached her, it tried to squash the idea that it was rather silly. He was frightened of scaring a girl who couldn't be younger than he was – possibly even in his year. She was definitely no first year – and when he did look at her, hard, he realized that she was familiar – one of those blurred faces of students he had never talked to himself – someone who didn't really bring much attention to herself. Someone who used the exact same tactics he probably would have if his early choice of friends would have let him. So he went out of his way not to cause more trouble than he already had, taking steps forward as if he were approaching something more skittish than a girl.
Until she gave him permission. He almost thought he might have imagined it, and paused – but the way she was looking at him gave him the courage at a quicker pace. It was far from normal speed, but he had just about reached her in a matter of seconds. Then, just in case, he bent down into that same half-crouch to avoid the floor and reached rather than get close, just reaching the rolled and ribboned parchment with outstretched fingers. When he stood, he offered it to her in the flat of his palm – still choosing to stay a few feet away, just so.
“There you go.” He added, planting a small, hopefully encouraging smile on his face as he held out the letter at arm's length. It dawned on him that it would probably be hard for her to take it with cat in arms, but he couldn't really think of doing anything else with it. It was hers, not his, after all. He wasn't sure why certain boundaries were set up, but he was fairly determined not to cross them.
“Easier for me to get it anyways, right. Your, ah...cat looks very comfortable. They don't like to be moved much, do they.”Making small talk seemed to be the easiest thing to do – although in current company saying just a few sentences made Remus feel like he was monopolizing the conversation in a very unfamiliar way. But to his surprise, it seemed to work. He froze, as she reached out, and he adjusted his own arm accordingly in case she was trying to get at the letter he was holding out to her. She would offer up something else though, rather than take back what was hers and dash off – which if he was truthful with himself, Remus was half afraid she would do.
“Leonie?” She had spoken in french before, and he was hardly an expert in languages, but he knew that wasn't a word for something else. It was different from everything else – different tone, different lightness. Everything. Before he could stop himself, he felt his smile change to an excited, beaming one – not totally sure how something had changed, but glad it had. “That's your name or something? I like it. I'm Remus.”
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Post by spoonygelato on Jul 5, 2012 21:57:40 GMT -5
A smile quirked on her lips as her eyes sparkled with interest. She liked his smile, it encouraged her to collect her letter and stay. Loosening her arms Soleil jumped away from her and proceeded to once again curl about Remus, as Leonie herself tied the letter to a small tawny owl and send it off for flight. Turning her attention back to the young man she smiled down at her cat. "That's Soleil, she.....seems to have taken to you." Finally, it seemed as though she managed to find her voice. A slight flush adorned her pale face, and she twirled her hair nervously. She was aware she didn't hold the most interesting conversations, and she also knew that she wasn't the prettiest thing to look at (she'd heard the small jeers about her apparent "washed out" look, as though the ocean she loved dearly swept away all the color on her.)
"Remus?" Her voice lilted out, giving his name a slight accent. "I like it, it's very sweet." She clasped her hands behind her back and laced her fingers together. She perched herself on one foot as the other danced around to hook behind her ankle, she seemed to teeter for a moment before securing her balance as she ran through several different topics to talk about, none of which bubbled to her lips immediately. Finally after much inner contemplation she decided on something rather generic, but something that would provide her with enough information to perhaps call Remus a friend. "S-so...what house are you in? How....how old are you?" Her voice trembled ever so slightly, and she realized at the last minute she could have asked him something that would have provided more chance for conversation, and could have prevented her having to also answer the question. She knew Hufflepuffs were sometimes looked down on by others, and being as skittish as she was the jeers became too much at times.
Being as insignificant as she knew she was, socializing was tough at times. Despite her pounding heart and slightly quickened breath she felt more at ease in front of one person than in a crowd. In a prominent display of interaction she slid herself steadily closer to him, making the conversation less cautious and more intimate. It was what normal people did, and Leonie was excited knowing her next letter to her mother would be about her new friend, and it brought elation to her heart knowing how happy her mother would be.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 11, 2012 10:40:01 GMT -5
He needn't have worried about the cat getting in the way of his inability to do anything other than offer her letter back to her. It seemed to be a fairly intelligent animal, and friendly. Remus didn't have any pets of his own – for obvious reasons – but that didn't mean he didn't like them. If Soleil wanted to rub herself against his legs, far be it from him to stop her. He even dropped his hands as the girl – Leonie, her name was Leonie – fixed her letter to a resident owl and brushed his fingers against the tip of it's bushy, swaying tail. “We'll, she's quite charming. I'm flattered.”
“Hey, that's me.” He continued, although he felt supremely stupid a moment later and which he'd just nodded or something. It sounded like a bad attempt at flirting, since he'd already introduced himself to begin with. Obviously he'd been spending too much time around the 'wrong' sort of company to manage talking to a girl platonicly and not make an idiot of himself. He shifted nervously from foot to foot, transferring his weight as he tried to figure continuing now that there was no letter to retrieve. He felt rather like he'd gone back to how he'd started this morning – not wanting to leave because he wasn't quite sure where to go.
Leonie, again, broke the silence – and this time it was her asking the questions. Maybe it was a sign that she really was more comfortable. He certainly hoped so – because it bothered him slightly, this unsurity that he was teetering on the edge of chasing someone off. “I'm in Gryffindor. Sixth Year. Although if you listen to the professors most of the year doesn't act it.” He grinned, despite himself, knowing without a doubt that it was his friends who caused this summerization. He blinked, wondering if she'd been that close before, and almost certain that she hadn't.
“What about you? Obviously you're not a first year...”Despite the nervousness that he'd equated to the newer, fresh-faced students in their first weeks, she was definitely older. “You look sort of familiar...”
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Post by spoonygelato on Jul 11, 2012 21:47:03 GMT -5
She smiled along with him, if she remembered correctly it was the group of boys from Gryffindor, James Sirius and...Remus! Blinking with slight surprise that one of those particular three were standing in front of her, she began to tap the toes of her suspended foot on the floor as a steady comfort. She appeared to gape for a moment, lips pursed and poised to release into an excited as well as embarrassed ramble about why he would talk to her, but stopped herself quickly before she could become even more humiliated. Snapping back when she realized her fears had been realized, the question had been turned on her, she lifted her index finger to her lips and held it there. Several emotions flashed through her eyes, though she controlled herself properly and decided on how to answer. She could be elegant enough about it, and try not to seem like she was too worried about how he felt.
Deciding the answer the latter question first she smiled quite timidly before she parted her lips. "People don't....notice me. I try not to be noticed, it keeps me.......safer." She was surprised she seemed familiar at all to him, despite the fact they had shared classes in the past. Of course he'd always seemed like someone that was out of reach, and she'd stopped noticing him as a separate person and he merely became one of the mass that moved around her. She kept her head down anyway so she couldn't recognize even most of her housemates. Even her room mates sometimes had to remind her who they were, and they didn't actually seem to like her much. "I'm in the same year as you. We've uh....had a few classes together in the past." She was sure they were sharing at least one class this year, but since she didn't pay attention to much beside the desk surrounding her...she couldn't place which one she'd seen him in...
"I'm a Hufflepuff. Silly I know..." With a small smile she teetered on her feet once more. She had brief memories of the day, the happiness but ever so slight disappointment on her father's face. She'd come from a long line of Ravenclaw's and seeing how she couldn't carry on the tradition caused her stomach to seize up in knots. Then she began simply thinking of her father... She appeared to deflate in front of Remus, her eyes shining with unshed tears at his memory. But now was not the time to drown in memories of those lost, he'd died doing what he loved. "A-anyway." She rubbed the back of her hand against her eyes, trying to control her twisting emotions.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 13, 2012 21:39:41 GMT -5
What did it mean, when she placed her finger to her lips? Honestly, he knew what it would usually mean – but didn't feel particularly loud or babbley, was he? Well...compared to her, perhaps – but she didn't seem to have minded it once we had gotten over the earlier start and stop of the surprise meeting. He lapsed into quietness anyways – hoping that it would help bolster her back from any line he might have crossed.
This was certainly an odd sort of morning. Not that he would go out and call Leonie odd. She was different, that was true – but it wasn't a crime. Everyone was. In fact, surprisingly enough, it was thrilling to talk to her. Sure, he constantly felt like he was worrying about doing too much, but since when had he, Remus Lupin, the relatively quiet boy and surprising friend of extraordinary troublemakers, the most outspoken person in ANY situation?
He returned her timid smile with an encouraging one of his own when she finally worked herself back up to answer him. “I see.” That was definitely a plan. It was obvious that Leonie wasn't likely comfortable around large groups (an amazing enough thing, thinking about how she'd have to survive a day to day existence in a massive school surrounded by hundreds of noisy students). Problem was, that seemed like an awfully lonely pursuit too. “Well, that's alright.” He decided, rather than point out how alinating that could be, or encourage her that it would be okay to speak out, to change, he simply agreed with her logic. He knew how he hated when people tried to tell him what to do – and as nice as she was, as nice as he was trying to be – they really only had just met. Even if they'd been students in classes together for five years. “I thought you were familiar, though! And I was right...”
“Hufflepuff's arn't silly, they're loyal.” Of course, that wasn't the common talk that was passed around the Gryffindor Common Room. A lot of people thought they were a bunch of duffers. But frankly Remus would have been glad if he'd made it into that house when he was sorted. The fact that he was terrified he wouldn't end up anywhere notwithstanding. “I know...plenty...of perfectly brilliant Hufflepuffs.” Well...he knew two...sort of...other prefects, both of them. But each house had their meritorious members – no matter what house superiority preached.
He looked up at her, after briefly turning away as he tried to keep the names of those Hufflepuffs he knew in the forefront of his memory in the off chance she asked after them, to find that her eyes were unnaturally bright. Damn, had he done something again? He hadn't thought he had, but you'd never know. “Hey, it's...it's okay. Everything alright?”
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Post by spoonygelato on Jul 23, 2012 21:24:10 GMT -5
A smile crept across her face. It amused her to see him trying to give her a thread of comfort. Not that she needed it, to her it didn't really matter what house she was in, so long as she was here learning something that could make her mother proud. But then again her dreams centered around the muggle world, being a famous concert violinist didn't require any magical talent, but it required a lot of dedication that she spent in empty corridors practicing where she knew no one would hear her. It was sad really the lengths she went to keep herself out of harm's way. "Loyal to the end most would say." Though bravery, she wasn't sure how much that counted. She could be quite the coward, but everyone always told her it wasn't really her fault.
She was sure he knew plenty of Hufflepuffs that were brilliant, but she shook her head and laughed lightly anyway. It was one of the first directly positive noises she had made during their awkward meeting, but she was happy she'd left her dorm this morning. The base of her hands dug into her eyes as she struggled to keep her control. "Oh all this house talk reminded me of mon pere. He uh, was killed by a werewolf during his research." With a quivering smile she took a deep breath. "I miss him is all." She shrugged, inwardly questioning why she was telling him all this. She decided it was because she'd kept all of this locked inside her for so long she needed someone to talk to, someone her own age willing to listen. Closing her eyes for a moment she sniffed delicately and looked down as Soleil mewed and curled around her legs. "I-I didn't mean to dump this on you. And I don't want you to think I hate werewolves or something." She ran a hand through her hair. It was the one thing people assumed when they heard the news. Surely the family despised the very thing that killed their beloved. They couldn't be any more wrong. "I don't. It wasn't the werewolf's fault."
She twisted her hands together and started to wonder where her siblings were. Surely they were tucked nicely into bed, warm and comfortable and not a wreck like she was. They always did get along better than her, then again they weren't so limited as she was. Taking another deep choking breath she felt the pressure vanish from behind her eyes, but she blinked again just to be sure.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 12:04:42 GMT -5
It finally seemed like they were finding a pattern, or easiness to the conversation. Which was good for everyone involved, really - but much better for him. He was feeling much closer to acting like his normal self - less censored, less worried about accidentally doing something to drive the skittish girl away. For a few moments he felt as if he'd suddenly gone back to first year - where he was certain anyone could tell who or what he was simply by looking at him.
"Exactly - and there are certainly worst things to be." Out of all the houses, he was sure that Hufflepuff would have been where he'd ended up if he hadn't miraculously landed in Gryffindor. There was indeed, something poetic about being just and standing by someone no matter what.
Remus should have known, though - that when he was involved nothing could be easy, at least for long. There would be always something big to screw up a moment of rest - be it something as simple as a friend needed help or wanting to get into some sort of mischief, or too much work. Rarely, thankfully, it directly involved his largest problem - but of course, that didn't mean it didn't happen at all.
"W-werewolf?" He stumbled. His mouth was suddenly desert dry, the hairs on the back of his neck prickling ever so slightly, enough bother that he actually took his hand and trying disrupt the feeling by kneeding it with his fingers. "Oh, that's...that's too bad. I'm so sorry to hear that." Leonie was quick to assure him that she wasn't prejudice or anything, but it did little to quell the sickening feeling in his stomach.
She was painfully shy, and skittish - and at least part of that reason, he was certain, was because she had just lost her dad to a monster. To someone like him. It was one of those moments he wished he could scream, or run or do something - but of course that would seem more suspicious than anything. He was very, very meticulous about trying to keep things under wraps. Besides, he had a feeling that if he did anything that, it would lose any respected he'd had, even if it was just for himself.
He closed his eyes, trying to take in a deep breath - but it hitched slightly as he pictured shining, predatory eyes, and claws and - and fangs. He knew exactly what Leonie's father would have seen before he died. He didn't have the luxury of forgetting it.
"I...really am sorry." He managed. "That's...really terrible. You, uh...probably want to be alone, right? I can go."
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Post by spoonygelato on Jul 24, 2012 19:11:10 GMT -5
"Non, s'il vous plait!" It erupted from her, surprisingly loudly, before she knew what she was doing. Hands clasping over her mouth in surprise she stood silently and gauged his reaction. She didn't want to lose the only, dare she say, friend she had in the school. Not so soon at least, but then suddenly she couldn't control her mouth. It was as if a dam had broken and words tumbled from her lips, blurred slightly together by her lilting accent that danced and sang over her diction. "Not so soon, please, you're the only ....friend...I have. I just-just- I have no one else. No one else pays attention to me or listens or talk, they only see this weird shy girl who avoids people like the plague. I have this condition, it's called selective mutism and it-it's like a severe anxiety disorder but it disrupts my life and I can't talk to people and I stutter and develop this monotone voice. It's....ruined me. I can't develop lasting relationships out of fear....I can't even live out my dreams because being in front of crowds causes anxiety attacks." She was becoming more and more desperate as she spoke. "I'm so afraid of people thinking I'm a freak and I've been alone for the six years I've been here...." She finally ran out of steam, her lips closing though trembling slightly. Her eyes once again shone, but with tears of pain and loneliness rather than fear and anxiety.
"I....went through the loss of my father alone." Her lips unfroze for a few precious moments again, she was breaking and needed to relieve the pressure. "My mother cried for days, and my brothers didn't know what to do. Angelette was only a year old at the time, so I took care of everyone, and I never cried for him. I couldn't afford to with mere in such a state. I.....because of what happened my youngest brother has a fear of canine's, and had nightmares for a while. My eldest brother wants to specialize in werewolf research to find a cure.... I don't know why I'm telling you all this...maybe I'm just sick of being alone. Please, don't leave." She gazed at him pleadingly. Through all her dramatics, she didn't miss his reactions to her previous statements. With her disorder she couldn't afford not to read others, and she noticed his hesitations and sudden anxiety. A small spark of curiosity grew in her, but she pushed the nagging to the back of her mind as she focused on the task at hand. She'd become noticeably paler during her rant, and perhaps the bags under her eyes revealed she had a few more troubles with daily life than she'd like to admit.
However, the sudden growling of her stomach didn't seem to help the situation at hand by any means.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2012 20:29:43 GMT -5
Remus had expected - hoped, actually - that she wouldn't have stopped him. He had a good excuse for getting away - she would probably like some time alone, and he was being gentlemanly enough to give it to her. He'd overstayed his welcome in the Owlery anyways. Suddenly the hundred so shifting, anxious birds were more accusatory than he'd have ever thought imaginable. She would chalk it up as sorry politeness, he'd make an effort to never, ever end up in this situation again. They both would win.
But no - by the time he had made towards the door still at her back, she made him stop. He paused at first, not because he actually understood her french, but because the sheer power of it seemed to freeze him to the spot. Not even since she had begun being comfortable around him had she spoken with such force. It was more than enough to spark his attention. Even she seemed surprised by it.
What she said, well...he almost regretted wanting to run and never look back. Almost, because he was certain that if she knew who, or what she was talking too, despite all her words about not blaming the creatures that took her father's life; well, Remus was sure she'd be rethinking the term friend. She probably go right back to being friendless, and being terribly happy for it. Thankful even.
But - he couldn't. He could just imagine what his friends might say. 'Remus you bloody sentimental fool.' A voice in the back of his mind that sounded remarkably like his own dad's was warning him to keep his head down, that things happened for a reason, for the best. In the end, he couldn't budge. He couldn't leave her there, crying - even if he thought it was the best thing for both of them. He wasn't as starved for companionship, because he had four of the best mates you could ask for, and a few fringe-worthy friends who he had managed to keep up with. He had a remarkably strong support group. How ironic was that? That a girl who'd probably done nothing wrong in their life had less of a chance to talk to anyone than a being most people didn't even classify as being human? That he was the one - out of any possible person in that school, that would find her, and be in the position of friendliness?
"You're not a freak." He added, very quietly. He felt like maybe he could do something more - pat her on the shoulder, be comforting in some way - but he just stood there, straight and frozen and keeping his distance, as usual. "You arn't. It's - you've just got a problem. Like everyone. Everyone has issues, at some point or another. Even..." He paused, liking his still very dry lips as he thought of how to proceed.
"At least you're still here." He added, picking at a small detail and running with it - running away from explaining how there could be so, so many things that could be worse. "You've managed for six years. Six. That's amazing for someone that's...someone like you. I don't think I'd have managed half that long." Indeed, he almost hadn't - some of the letters home in his first year had been rather desperate pleas to his parents that they made a mistake in sending him to school. There were too many people. Things were really strange, and hard. Especially for people with secrets. "You've got your family, still. Right? I'm sure they really appreciate what you do for them. And...if you don't want me to go..."
He'd stay - but not for the first time he wished he had his friend Peter's knack for disappearing. He still wouldn't have minded becoming very small and hiding far, far away.
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